Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Principal Conference

I got a letter from the school yesterday concerning Alex.

This is a first offence.
Nature of Incident: Fighting his little sister. Pooped in his pants again. Second request for Alex to ride the Special Ed bus or his mom to provide transportation.
Action taken by School Administration: Principal held conference with studen and student was reprimanded. Parent is to come to school for a conference.

I called the bus driver last night at home and asked why on a first offence she requested that he be transferred. Not only that, but Mary-Jo was fighting as well, so why was Alex the only one written up. The only thing that she wanted to talk about was that Alex had pooped his pants on that day and that she had to move him up to sit behind her and she had to smell it until he got off the bus. I explained to her that I really did not want to split Alex and Mary-Jo between two different school buses.

When I got to the school today to have a conference with the principal, it turns out that the main complaint from the bus driver is that poop got on the seat. This is a bald-face lie! Alex has never had poop on his clothes (I'm the one who washes them) since the first day of school. The principal wanted to know if he had a medical condition for the soiling. He does. Well she wanted to put it in his file. I am just totally opposed to having this in his permanent school record. This is something that he will grow out of and I do not want this following him the rest of his school life.

I made an appointment with our Pedi for tomorrow. I'm not taking Alex, I want to have a sit down talk with the doctor and tell him that the 2 previous treatments are NOT working and I want to have tests done find a specific cause. Alex does not know when he has to go to the bathroom. I have never seen him purposefully soiling his pants, it just slips out.

3 comments:

Sandi said...

Marilyn I am so sorry that you are going through this. A point to clarify is that school records do not follow your child as you think they do. When children leave grade school those files are boxed and stored for the required number of years. When a child enters secondary school a new file is created. Having it in his file does nothing more than let the people who should know about his condition know about it.

As a teacher, I find that type of information useful. It also helps a teacher become much more compassionate to the issue.

Marilyn said...

Sandi, thanks for the clarification.

I think a teacher should be compassionate no matter what. Why is it that it takes a doctor's statement to make them compassionate to an issue when they have witnessed it themselves.

I'm tired of the eye-rolling and the silent groans, but most especially their input on how to solve my son's problem. Don't they think that if it was that easy, it would be solved by now?

Sandi, I certainly am not directing this to you, I'm just really irked at the ultimatims, the total lack of compassion and their unwillingness to help Alex have a successful accident free day. At home I have to tell Alex to go to the bathroom just about every hour. He has no sensation to tell him if he needs to go. However, because this interupts his playtime, I also have to supervise at least half of the potty trips because a lot of the times he will just walk in there for a few minutes, do nothing, and walk out.

I know I can't expect the teacher to do this every hour, but I know that the whole class has bathroom breaks every 2 hours.

Sandi said...

I am not taking it personally at all and I hope my comments are not affecting you that way either. I am just giving you something else to ponder.

Marilyn I completely agree that it should not, and does not, require a piece of paper to make someone more compassionate. However, that being said, I know that Alex is not doing this willfully, but there are kids who do! Some kids will do just about anything to make a problem.

Also, it makes the teacher aware that the family has looked into this situation. I have had parents pass off exteremely small stuff like bloody noses to big stuff like autism as though nothing was going on.

As far as the people talking. I am sorry that is happening. For some reason people think they need to put their two cents in. No matter how ridiculous it is.

I pray that you will find some comfort in this situation and that the Dr. will be able to help Alex.